Question.
Anyone know of a good over-the-counter pain medication?
I got the biggest mother of a headache last night. Now, recalling past experiences with aspirin-products, I opted NOT to take the Excedrine we have in the apartment, being that it's loaded with caffeine, and this was right before bedtime. So, I tossed and turned for an hour or so before finally falling asleep. I woke up this morning to take the dog out and get breakfast for Kieron, only to discover that said headache is still pounding away at my skull. Went back to sleep. Few hours later, wake up, and headache is still being a pussy bitch. So I caved and took some Excedrine. That was four hours ago, and I'm still having the shakes and feeling faint and sweaty. It's a toss-up as to which is worse--the headache or the jitters. I don't want to take Ibuprofin or Aleve either, since the labels warn of possible stomach bleeding. Is there a natural cure for headaches that doesn't involve possible hemorraging or caffeinated convulsing?
8.22.2006
It's been a billion years since I posted! Anyways, I'm sure I'm way behind and everyone already knows about this site, but if you don't you have to check it out. I know you all love music tons - www.pandora.com - it's the sweetest site. You type in a artist or song name and then it comes up with tons of songs similar and you can thumb up or thumb down and it'll just play music continously. I love it - my songs on ITunes get old and I can't afford to keep buying new ones, so this is like radio without crappy songs!
8.21.2006
I guess its time for the announcement.
I got a job. Well, not just a job, a good job, a great job, a job that could potentially be the job of my dreams. I will be getting paid a hefty sum plus benefits to work for [the Very Large Corporation of America or the VLCA]. I will get to travel because my job is consulting for the different parts of the company in at least 180 different countries around the world. The countries I'm most likely to visit include
I got a job. Well, not just a job, a good job, a great job, a job that could potentially be the job of my dreams. I will be getting paid a hefty sum plus benefits to work for [the Very Large Corporation of America or the VLCA]. I will get to travel because my job is consulting for the different parts of the company in at least 180 different countries around the world. The countries I'm most likely to visit include
- Africa
- Angola, Chad, Democratic Republic of the Congo, Republic of the Congo, Cote d'Ivoire, Equatorial Guinea, Kenya, Libya, Nigeria, Sao Tome and Principe, and South Africa
- Asia and the Pacific
- Australia, Azerbaijan, Bangladesh, Burma, Cambodia, China, Georgia, India, Indonesia, Japan, Kazakhstan, South Korea, Kuwait, New Zealand, Pakistan, Philippines, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Singapore, Thailand, Turkey, and Vietnam
- Europe
- Belgium, Denmark, Faroe Islands, France, Netherlands, Norway, and the United Kingdom
- The Americas
- Argentina, Brazil, Canada, Colombia, Mexico, Puerto Rico, Trinidad and Tobago, and Venezuela
I'm pretending that searching for my students-to-be on MySpace, Facebook, and the Alaska Court System counts as productivity. Because if it doesn't, I'd have to read the stupid composition textbook to be productive. (Is this searching business unethical? I mean, they're putting their info in a public space...)
So far, I've found several interesting students:
28-year-old gay guy/figure skating fanatic
One has legally changed his name
2 students have violations for tinted windows
One girl's boyfriend looks like Will Smith. They evidently make out a lot -- or just take pictures regularly.
One has a trust fund.
PS: Some of my students were born in 1988. 1988! Crazy.
So far, I've found several interesting students:
28-year-old gay guy/figure skating fanatic
One has legally changed his name
2 students have violations for tinted windows
One girl's boyfriend looks like Will Smith. They evidently make out a lot -- or just take pictures regularly.
One has a trust fund.
PS: Some of my students were born in 1988. 1988! Crazy.
8.20.2006
Why are theater people so awful?
Lately I've been thinking, when I see a play or musical; are the talents as wretched in real life as the ones I've known outside the theater? I worked with several of them at B and N, which apparently is a hotspot for the theatrically inclined. They were all social with one another, but an odd, false feeling about it...one always trying to out-loud the other, saying things they learned to be clever in improv classes. Everyone gives off this bisexuality, not because it's real, but because it's chic to be all, "oh, I could TOTALLY fall in love with someone of the same sex, it just hasn't happened yet." and the rest of that line of thinking that has become cliche since the moment Elle Macpherson uttered it on a talk show to promote a made- for- tv movie. It's just all so fake. They never take their clown makeup off.
Lately I've been thinking, when I see a play or musical; are the talents as wretched in real life as the ones I've known outside the theater? I worked with several of them at B and N, which apparently is a hotspot for the theatrically inclined. They were all social with one another, but an odd, false feeling about it...one always trying to out-loud the other, saying things they learned to be clever in improv classes. Everyone gives off this bisexuality, not because it's real, but because it's chic to be all, "oh, I could TOTALLY fall in love with someone of the same sex, it just hasn't happened yet." and the rest of that line of thinking that has become cliche since the moment Elle Macpherson uttered it on a talk show to promote a made- for- tv movie. It's just all so fake. They never take their clown makeup off.
8.15.2006
A bit of advice: if it's 4 a.m. and you can't sleep, don't pass the time by browsing Yahoo Answers. People ask the stupidest questions. One girl was wondering why a tampon didn't absorb the urine she leaked when she laughed. OK, yes, that's funny...but a lot of the questions are NOT funny. Example:
If we’re at war with Islamic fundamentalists, why don’t’ we just say it like it is?
Apparently they’re MAD, believing we’re disrespecting Islam in their parts of the world.
Sadly, “The War” continues to be defined incorrectly as a “War on Terror” (AKA War on War)? This definition contributes to confusion keeping us unfocused.
George Bush finally said last week, “We’re at war with Islamic Fascists”
Don’t we need to vigorously investigate suspicious Airport, (travel) behavior?
If you’re of Middle Eastern decent flying in the USA isn’t that suspicious, shouldn’t they expect extra screening? Presently we spend the same amount of screening time on 90 old great grandmothers from Atlanta.
Why is the simple truth so difficult to come to grips with? We have limited resources why not focus them?
Grrrrrrrrrrr. Mad! People suck.
If we’re at war with Islamic fundamentalists, why don’t’ we just say it like it is?
Apparently they’re MAD, believing we’re disrespecting Islam in their parts of the world.
Sadly, “The War” continues to be defined incorrectly as a “War on Terror” (AKA War on War)? This definition contributes to confusion keeping us unfocused.
George Bush finally said last week, “We’re at war with Islamic Fascists”
Don’t we need to vigorously investigate suspicious Airport, (travel) behavior?
If you’re of Middle Eastern decent flying in the USA isn’t that suspicious, shouldn’t they expect extra screening? Presently we spend the same amount of screening time on 90 old great grandmothers from Atlanta.
Why is the simple truth so difficult to come to grips with? We have limited resources why not focus them?
Grrrrrrrrrrr. Mad! People suck.
8.10.2006
Want to hear something hilarious?
Our air conditioner has been unusable since July 2005. The landlord was repeatedly contacted about it but didn't bother to take any action to fix it. Whatever, the landlord's an asshole.
We gave notice that we're moving to a new place on Sept 1st a few weeks ago, because.. well, the landlord's an asshole, and we found a much nicer place nearby. So this week, who comes waltzing into the apartment (the locked apartment, by the way, and there was no knocking or ringing of any bells or giving any phonecalls prior to simply unlocking the apartment door and coming right in) but the asshole landlord, with an air-conditioner-mechanic in tow.
Apparently this air-conditioner-mechanic is the only one in the entire Midwest region, and "he's been so backed up" and had to fix air condioners all over MN, ND, WI, etc. Lucky us that he could fit us into his tight schedule.
Suuuure. Crock of shit. Fixing air conditioners is far from rocket science, and some part of me (perhaps the "I'm not a fucking idiot" part?) is pretty certain that there just may be a few more of "his kind" in the Cities, let alone the entire Midwest.
Now we have a (semi)working air-conditioner. Dago prick. It's pretty obvious that the only reason he finally got around to fixing it is so he can attract a replacement tenant by advertising this apartment as having AC. I hope he chokes on a fucking sausage.
Our air conditioner has been unusable since July 2005. The landlord was repeatedly contacted about it but didn't bother to take any action to fix it. Whatever, the landlord's an asshole.
We gave notice that we're moving to a new place on Sept 1st a few weeks ago, because.. well, the landlord's an asshole, and we found a much nicer place nearby. So this week, who comes waltzing into the apartment (the locked apartment, by the way, and there was no knocking or ringing of any bells or giving any phonecalls prior to simply unlocking the apartment door and coming right in) but the asshole landlord, with an air-conditioner-mechanic in tow.
Apparently this air-conditioner-mechanic is the only one in the entire Midwest region, and "he's been so backed up" and had to fix air condioners all over MN, ND, WI, etc. Lucky us that he could fit us into his tight schedule.
Suuuure. Crock of shit. Fixing air conditioners is far from rocket science, and some part of me (perhaps the "I'm not a fucking idiot" part?) is pretty certain that there just may be a few more of "his kind" in the Cities, let alone the entire Midwest.
Now we have a (semi)working air-conditioner. Dago prick. It's pretty obvious that the only reason he finally got around to fixing it is so he can attract a replacement tenant by advertising this apartment as having AC. I hope he chokes on a fucking sausage.
8.07.2006
This is dedicated to the customers at B and N, which I am wonderfully no longer a member of.
The Hot Chocolate Bitch.
Ok, this woman (attractive, mid-thirties) comes in EVERY DAY to get a medium skim hot chocolate-extra hot-and two rice krispie squares. This is a 7.50 purchase, for something that she could get for about 3 dollars in a gas station if she's totally against making them herself, and it would taste A LOT better. Beyond that, though I can charm the skin off a rattlesnake, this bitch never cracked a smile, and I had made it my mission. After awhile, I changed my mission to avoid waiting on her at all costs.
The One Pump Mocha Frappuccino Bitch.
This woman came in one night, accused my co-worker of not putting mocha into her drink, "Um, what are you doing?! What are you putting in my drink?" "Uh...mocha..." "No, No, I KNOW you guys have your mocha on THAT side of the cafe!" We have two mocha pumps...and she's a psychopath. She then came back and declared that "It just doesn't taste right. Can you remake it?" So I informed her that we had run out of regular frap mix, and thus were only serving the low-fat shit, and she was the only one who noticed...I told her I could make it with espresso and cream base...of which she made me make the fucking drink THREE TIMES and demanded a bakery dessert, and made sure that we'd get an order in of the regular mix the next day. Then from that day forward, she'd make sure all employees showed her that we were using the regular mix and makes us wait while she "taste tests" her piece of shit drink.
The Obviously Impoverished Family with Five Kids that Spends 20 Dollars on Fraps One Minute Before Close.
Man, that irritated me.
The Piece of Shit American that Speaks Spanish just to be a Fuck.
Comes in just before close to get a free cup of water and have someone validate his existence. He literally comes ALL THE WAY TO BARNES AND NOBLE, TO THE BACK OF THE STORE, just to fuck with the cafe workers. Behold, my first encounter:
"Hola! Necesito {insert mad fast spanish here}"
"Um...what?"
{Repeats fast spanish just as fast}
"I don't know what you're saying..."
"Oh, I need a cup of water." No sign of an accent.
"Ok..."
"Yeah, I like to come in here and do that to girls I haven't been waited on by before. I do that at the movie theater a lot. It's just funny to see the dumb look on their faces."
"You think we look dumb when you come in here just to get a cup of water and speak another language that isn't even your first one, JUST to mess with us?"
"Aw, come on, it's funny!"
The Ann Coulter Fan
Comes up to the counter with Godless, by Ann Coulter.
"Yeah, I want an apple purse for here."
"Ok, would you like that heated up with caramel on it?"
"NO, I don't want that! Jesus, you'll ruin it! Just give me some whipped cream."
"Ok, tell me when."
Proceeds to let me pile mountains of whipped cream all over the plate.
"heh heh. I like a little apple with my whipped cream. Heh heh."
"Yeah. So do you want to buy that?" Point to Ann the Cooze Coulter.
"Oh, DEFINITELY. We just LOVE her. We listen to her on the radio everynight. Last night she just had some HILARIOUS things to say about, you know, our favorite people...heh heh."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Yeah. So do you want a bag?"
"No, I'm going to start reading it here. I'm too excited to wait."
The Hot Chocolate Bitch.
Ok, this woman (attractive, mid-thirties) comes in EVERY DAY to get a medium skim hot chocolate-extra hot-and two rice krispie squares. This is a 7.50 purchase, for something that she could get for about 3 dollars in a gas station if she's totally against making them herself, and it would taste A LOT better. Beyond that, though I can charm the skin off a rattlesnake, this bitch never cracked a smile, and I had made it my mission. After awhile, I changed my mission to avoid waiting on her at all costs.
The One Pump Mocha Frappuccino Bitch.
This woman came in one night, accused my co-worker of not putting mocha into her drink, "Um, what are you doing?! What are you putting in my drink?" "Uh...mocha..." "No, No, I KNOW you guys have your mocha on THAT side of the cafe!" We have two mocha pumps...and she's a psychopath. She then came back and declared that "It just doesn't taste right. Can you remake it?" So I informed her that we had run out of regular frap mix, and thus were only serving the low-fat shit, and she was the only one who noticed...I told her I could make it with espresso and cream base...of which she made me make the fucking drink THREE TIMES and demanded a bakery dessert, and made sure that we'd get an order in of the regular mix the next day. Then from that day forward, she'd make sure all employees showed her that we were using the regular mix and makes us wait while she "taste tests" her piece of shit drink.
The Obviously Impoverished Family with Five Kids that Spends 20 Dollars on Fraps One Minute Before Close.
Man, that irritated me.
The Piece of Shit American that Speaks Spanish just to be a Fuck.
Comes in just before close to get a free cup of water and have someone validate his existence. He literally comes ALL THE WAY TO BARNES AND NOBLE, TO THE BACK OF THE STORE, just to fuck with the cafe workers. Behold, my first encounter:
"Hola! Necesito {insert mad fast spanish here}"
"Um...what?"
{Repeats fast spanish just as fast}
"I don't know what you're saying..."
"Oh, I need a cup of water." No sign of an accent.
"Ok..."
"Yeah, I like to come in here and do that to girls I haven't been waited on by before. I do that at the movie theater a lot. It's just funny to see the dumb look on their faces."
"You think we look dumb when you come in here just to get a cup of water and speak another language that isn't even your first one, JUST to mess with us?"
"Aw, come on, it's funny!"
The Ann Coulter Fan
Comes up to the counter with Godless, by Ann Coulter.
"Yeah, I want an apple purse for here."
"Ok, would you like that heated up with caramel on it?"
"NO, I don't want that! Jesus, you'll ruin it! Just give me some whipped cream."
"Ok, tell me when."
Proceeds to let me pile mountains of whipped cream all over the plate.
"heh heh. I like a little apple with my whipped cream. Heh heh."
"Yeah. So do you want to buy that?" Point to Ann the Cooze Coulter.
"Oh, DEFINITELY. We just LOVE her. We listen to her on the radio everynight. Last night she just had some HILARIOUS things to say about, you know, our favorite people...heh heh."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Yeah. So do you want a bag?"
"No, I'm going to start reading it here. I'm too excited to wait."
8.04.2006
Last night, Jillian and I watched the final episode of Six Feet Under. For three years we've rented disc after disc, catching up with the Fishers every time we got together. Despite the temptation to watch ahead during the months between visits, we didn't cheat. It was our thing; we flew thousands of miles and then spent our time together watching our show. And now it's done. It feels empty -- which is odd. I never thought I'd feel that way about a TV show. The end of Six Feet is the end of an era. Cliché, yes, but also true.
If you have never seen this show, WATCH IT. Go to your local video store and pick up the first disc of the first season IMMEDIATELY. You thought Sex and the City was addictive? Well...so is Six Feet. But it's a better addiction -- much more thought-provoking and beautiful. So much bigger. And so much less disappointing in the end.
/advertisement
If you have never seen this show, WATCH IT. Go to your local video store and pick up the first disc of the first season IMMEDIATELY. You thought Sex and the City was addictive? Well...so is Six Feet. But it's a better addiction -- much more thought-provoking and beautiful. So much bigger. And so much less disappointing in the end.
/advertisement
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